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Submitted by PatientsEngage on 21 March 2016

By Vedika Aum, an ongoing survivor of depression. The image is of a sketch by Vedika depicting bursting forth through the darkness

I live I laugh I create I think I learn

...and I question

I meet silence

I question again and am told to be silent

Watch in silence

Obey in silence

Silence your thoughts, 
your questions

I face deafening silence within and without

The silence implodes bursting without in destructive expression

                    in words

                    in tears

                    in blood

Besieging

Imploring

Demanding

...and quietening in silent whimpers

I wait for understanding - In vain

The bars of fear of indifference, of ignorance are too high and strong for me to reach across

I wait….in vain, in my enforced prison sometimes drowning sometimes staying afloat
bobbing in the river of roucous silence

I wait some more 
bleed some more

Till I understand,

it's just me who can understand myself
just me who can hold my hand
just me who will reach out to embrace my tears away
Only me who can help me to break free from this endless waiting
hoping
this enforced prison of silence that surrounds me…..

I break free !

 

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